Presence

I have been giving a lot of thought lately to the idea of "mindfulness". Interestingly, while I have been mulling over this concept for quite some time, I have not until recently had a term to which I could latch on that defined the direction my thoughts were taking. The basic idea is that for many of us, our minds are constantly scattered in many different directions by the rising tides and endless bufferings of daily life. We do not take (or make) time to focus our minds on one particular task. We allow ourselves to lose sight of the present moment while we lament (or celebrate) the past, or anticipate the future. The present moment is lost in a turbulent sea of various stressors, be they internally or externally imposed. Our mind wanders and the present moment is lost.

I will readily admit that I am not well read in philosophy but I feel fairly certain that there is some line of philosophical thinking that covers recurring motifs and themes in a person's life. The concept of presence - actually being in the present moment - has crossed my radar often. I believe that my foray into long-distance running has only served to heighten my awareness of this idea. If one loses their focus in the present moment in the course of a long run, or allows the mind to wander beyond simply hitting the next short-term goal or target, then the task at hand can seem overwhelming. It may be difficult to comprehend running for 30, 50, or 100 miles or more but when one thinks about running the current 5 mile segment or perhaps making to the next tree, bush, or curve in the trail, the task isn't quite so insurmountable. There are even athletes who run up to 100 miles on a standard 400 meter track. I have a difficult time imagining the kind of focus it must take to remain in the moment for literally hours on end running in circles!

My mind is generally a fractured mess of past, present and future. The inescapable array of daily distractions and obligations seem overwhelming at times, and it's in running that I often find a sanctuary. However, I have progressed to the point that even running provides little solace for me, as running itself has become somewhat effortless. The mind is not really focused on running (unless I am on a technical trail) and as such it is bandied about by the various preoccupations that assail me. I enjoy listening to music when I run as this also allows a mental "break" but I am coming to the realization that this is not the ideal solution, either.

So what is the next step? As I have said in previous posts, my life does not yet mirror the principles that I claim are so important to me. And so, I return to mindfulness. I am sure that I am not giving the concept a fair shake as I have only begun a cursory exploration into what it means and how it can be applied in my own life, both as a part of my running and as a part of "everything else". If I can focus my mind then perhaps I can move incrementally toward becoming the person I want to be. And, of course, the runner I hope to be as well!